We have really missed our Daddy for the last 5 days! I was thinking with Ryan gone I'd have a little more free time, to do things like catch up on laundry, put the Christmas decorations away, and do a good deep clean on the bathrooms and kitchens - I don't know what I was thinking!!
It's all I can do to just keep on top of the everyday messes! I've been spending a lot of time scrubbing markers and crayons off the walls and furniture, pulling my children off each other and just keeping the toys picked up! I think I must not be quite as scary as Daddy, because they're being extra naughty and don't seem to want to mind AT ALL!!
I feel frazzled and over extended - but have really enjoyed all the alone time I get after the boys are in bed! It's kind of this new found since of freedom as I can watch all the sappy girl movies I want (that Ryan would never watch with me.) Plus I can wear whatever I want without thinking about the time that Ryan said he didn't like this shirt, or do my hair however I want without worring about whither of not Ryan would like it this way. Plus I don't have to wear make-up, or contacts, or even shower if I don't feel like it and I don't even feel bad! There's no guilt when I don't get everything cleaned up and dinner on the table by 6pm - I'm just doing my own thing.
I guess I never realized how much I stress about perfection - and wanting to be this great wife - which is a good goal, BUT WOW - I never realized how stressed I was about it. So it has been a nice break, and a good learning experience, but I'm ready to have Ryan come home - if only to keep my kids in line!
Tomorrow is THE day!
Naomi Gwenaelle Grant
2 months ago